This is a perfect example of Living Consciously. If we are not housebound, we come across all sections of the population every day. And, even if we are, and we have a computer, most of us are on it daily and come across all sorts of interesting people and thought-provoking ideas. Hopefully, we will at least have people visit us at some point. So -- what is our thinking process at these times?
When you see people, do you really see them; do you actually interact with them? Do you look into their eyes, do you feel something? When people write to you, what do you see in their words, did you feel something about what they said -- intended or not intended? Did you feel that they were writing consciously?
What was their reaction to seeing you? Did they smile, did they look away, did their eyes cloud over, did they look right through you? Did they answer your message, how did they answer, did they even take time to answer, or did they not answer at all?
How did you feel after that brief one-second interaction? Did they make you feel invisible? Did they cheer you up because they said a cheery, "Hi," or smile at you for one brief second? How did you feel when those people didn't write right back? Did you say to yourself, "well, they're just busy," or "they don't like me anymore"? How did you feel when they did write back?
One second can make the difference in our entire lives. And that one second can make or break us for that one second. Sure we forget about it right after it happens, but did it go into our memory banks? Sure it did! We capture those moments, just like a camera. Unconsciously, the pictures we have taken sink into our memory bank, and they lie there like undeveloped film waiting to be developed. We may never "develop" those thoughts again, but that doesn't mean that they aren't there. They are recorded forever. They are called negatives.
If we can realize how that one second can affect us, think about how this can affect the other person too. If you smiled back, or said "Hi," did you add to that positive energy, or did you ignore them and thereby lessen it? If you wrote back immediately, or waited a couple of days, did you make them feel like you weren't interested, or just busy, or that you didn't like them, or worse still that you didn't even care how they felt? Even if you wrote straight back, what did you say? Did you give your words conscious thought?
Wouldn't it be so much better for all of us, if after all is said and done all the snapshots in our memory banks were positive, conscious thoughts. "Well," you say, "Easier said than done." Absolutely! That's what it's all about.
Think of it like this. Every time we react to something unconsciously, our brains take a picture. These pictures are filed away in the form of negatives. But our brain isn't our only memory bank. Our memories (negatives) are encapsulated in every cell throughout our entire body. When we bring these unconscious thoughts out, they are developed and go into a nicely organized picture album. There is no reason now for us to have a meltdown because we have all these disorganized, unruly negatives rattling around in our bodies! There are enough photo albums in us for millions of pictures. And we don't even have to categorize them; it's done for us. We were born with the software already installed! These have now become our conscious thoughts. We have recognized them and given them life. And they are now organized.
I believe, although I don't have any research to prove it, that our negative, unconscious memories are always laying there right on the surface, randomly waiting to be called into consciousness. Our albums are right there waiting to be filled and must be, in order for us to live contented, meaningful, happy lives. Album #1,000,000, or whatever number it gets to be, depending upon how conscious we are, is the album where our conscious thoughts go directly without having to be sorted and categorized. So much better to have a conscious thought first than to struggle to remember an unconscious one and then have to develop it. Develop them immediately. Nice and easy.
So, next time you see your cleaning lady, street sweeper, yard raker, sanitary engineer, or just plain old stranger, look at them square in the eye, smile, and say "hello." The next time you receive a message from someone, give it some conscious thought -- write back and tell them what's on your mind and how their message affected you. It'll be the best conscious thought you've had in a long time, and you'll feel great that you were able to write back, with substance, or smile at someone with forethought -- consciously knowing what you were doing every step of the way. Notice your results. I'm willing to bet they'll be positive and you won't have to deal with that moment ever again, except to remember it as a happy picture in the photo album of your conscious memories. Here's to all of you! ©Deirdre Moignard Miller
"The greatest discovery of my generation is that a man can alter his life simply by altering his attitude of mind." ~ William James
Living Consciously - Part Two
After I wrote the last article, a dear friend of mine who was kind enough to critique it for me, suggested that perhaps you might like some practical ideas on how to Live Consciously, and I thought, "Well, yes! How stupid of me!" It's easy to say something, to tell your own story, to suggest that perhaps it might be a good idea to do something, but hello! What about actually helping someone to do all that if you already know the trick? See, I can live unconscious moments too -- even while writing about it!
To add even more energy to the idea, I received the following profound story from one of my Internet correspondents. Unfortunately, I can't give credit to the writer, because alas, I do not know. But if someone does know, I would love to be able to do so. You may have read it before, and if you have, perhaps you'd like to read it again:
"During my second month of nursing school, our professor gave us a pop quiz. I was a conscientious student and had breezed through the questions, until I read the last one:
'What is the first name of the woman who cleans the school?
Surely this was some kind of joke. I had seen the cleaning woman several times. She was tall, dark-haired and in her 50s, but how would I know her name?
I handed in my paper, leaving the last question blank. Just before class ended, one student asked if the last question would count toward our quiz grade.
"Absolutely," said the professor. "In your careers, you will meet many people. All are significant. They deserve your attention and care, even if all you do is smile and say 'hello'."
I've never forgotten that lesson. I've also never forgotten her name was Dorothy."
""The distance doesn't matter, only the first step is difficult."
--Madame Marquise du Deffand
